Best friend.

When I was a little and somewhat losing people, I thought having a best friend was about having “my person”, somebody I could have forever, someone who would be there for me, someone who would never fight with me or turn against me.

It was a pretty magical notion to be true.

I thought having a best friend means constant contact, conversations everyday, good days everyday, and I thought it meant having the world in one person, but reality is complicated to comprehend and yet it’s beautiful when you finally do.

I recently came to terms with the idea that a best friend is in fact not somebody who will never ever argue with you, it is somebody who will fight with you the most, whom you will want to punch out of anger, but you will overlook the rage and choose to understand, whom you will forgive a million times if needed.

It is somebody who cannot always be there with you, everyday, but when you need them they leave the world behind. It is somebody who constantly annoys the hell out of you, makes fun of you, but respects you the most. It is somebody who has the courage to forgive, to reconcile, to build from the broken again, to make a home from what is left.

It is somebody who gives meaning to the word ‘forever’

Somebody beautiful told me something I wish I had understood long ago, that best friendship is about quality and not quantity with regards to time, memories, or conversations. It’s about how meaningful they make your life.

It is about having people who you can go back to, regardless of the time chasms, no matter how bitter the end, 

and when you do, 

it’s just the same as it was where you left off.

-Marlyn Pereira

Sunshine and Shadows 

“There will come a time when peace will seem like a long lost luxury. In the middle of chaos you will find yourself standing, lost in no thought specifically but you will feel like you’re concrete, you will feel numb, and you will begin to question whether being this stoic is even human?
There will come a time, when you will have no idea what to do, and you will come back to reality after zoning out a thousand times, from some moment you wished you were in, or one that you wished you never lived through. 
But remember that these days of feeling indifferent or rather inhuman, don’t last long. They are demons, shadows that leave remnants of themselves through the sunshine, but although they exist they don’t overpower. 
These are parcels that come along with life for us to learn that the sun and the shadows are metaphorical balanced entities that explain life quite simply, if you pay attention. 
They explain that the good and bad are equally present in life, either cannot be eliminated, and that there is always something to make back from either.

Learning to unlearn. 

I have been teaching myself a lot lately. Doing what you love to do, alone, can be very daunting 

So I have been pushing myself to learn and unlearn certain things. -Its okay if you’re not as good as those writers who you love. You are yourself and that is unique. No one can write the way you do because that is what it is. Everyone is different. -Its okay if you’re not good at art, you can still keep trying to make it for yourself. You don’t need an audience. Do it because you want to -Push yourself as much as you can but don’t force yourself. There is a difference. Pushing is motivating, forcing is wrong, it’s negative and art is created from inspiration and not demands. -Learn to unlearn all that you know in order to see new things, or old things the new way. Perspective is everything -Dont give up. You don’t need a silver lining. Fame is just an illusion. Art is meant to touch hearts, to be understood and loved, not simply bought or looked at. -Be happy.

-WANDERER // learning to unlearn

Resilience

There was resilience 

pouring from the skies that day, 

not in the form of rain 

but in the form of dusk.

Black, the colour that always 

allayed my restless mind, 

had come to my rescue. 

Tides and tides of ‘what ifs’ 

inside my mind, kept drowning 

all the hope that was hiding,

beneath the remnants of failure.

Overwhelmed, 

I took a deep breath, 

took the steps I had once learnt 

to overcome this anxiety,

and I let all the possibilities sink in.

I closed my eyes, and let the darkness wrap itself around me, 

like a blanket of security 

and as the dusk broke the light

to a million red and yellow strokes across the sky.
I nestled in the arms 

of the night, and watched time pass, as I waited and waited

for my dream to come true.

Somehow, the silence, 

made me believe 

that it’s all going to be alright.

Time and Death.

Time is a different way of dying, to me. I have always associated time with death.

I thought of them as similar tragedies, but with a different face and a different name.

Everyday, little by little we are consumed by time, and before we know it, it is another sunrise. We lose track, we run late, we plan and we plot but timing, has its own way. 

Time and death have always been one, playing us, with wit and with will and what I realised is that time, simply consumes us, until we have nothing left to consume.

When death comes, death simply comes for an empty soul, devoid of life and everything that the alter ego of death already took away.